Sunshine (again).

"You look good"


Yan ang tanging nasambit ko sa kanya nung nagkaharap na kami. Totoo naman, basing from the last time we've met, mas relaxed yung mukha nya ngayon. Maiksi na ang buhok na lalong nagpapatingkad sa kanyang mapupugay na chinitong mata. His complexion is a bit lighter, and his body a little bit toned. 


"Ikaw din"


Yan lang naisagot niya.


Siya ang tinatawag kong "Sunhine" (see previous posts), ang ex ko at kauna-unahang naka relasyon na lalake. We started our relationship a year ago around this time din. Ours was not the usual courtship kasi we became a couple before we even met each other. Ang sabi namin sa isa't-isa, we would try loving each other not because of the physical attributes but rather we banked on the emotional connection. It was January 25, 2010 that we officially became a couple, From that time, we never had an idea how each of us looked like. I fell in love with his being "pure" and innocent. He is way younger than me yet he never fails to let me feel that what we lack in physical connection (because it was a long distance relationship), he always make it up to being so sweet over the phone.


The long distance relationship went on for two months before we decided to meet up. I went to Cebu for a business meeting and we agreed that this was the time to finally unmask everything. We also agreed that if any of us won't like each other in person, then one can go out of the relationship right away. We understood that its still different when you are in love with somebody over the phone as against seeing that person in person.


We met.


Then decided to continue. Just like the person that I have loved in the phone, he look so young and innocent (did I mention good looking chinito?). On the other hand, he likes the cute "rugged" persona that I have (that's according to him). We were very "happy" that day. We just imprisoned ourselves in the hotel room and cuddled each other like newlyweds. The love between us during that time was overflowing. Every bit of his kiss and caresses were my personal heroine. I can't get enough of him and vice versa.


However, just like the saying "some good things never last", so was our relationship. From then on, it was a downhill ride. I have to admit, we were growing crazy over each other to the point of being so strict and tight. Jealousy, doubts and too much expectations took a  toll on our budding love. The difference in the discipline between us two was also highlighted during this period. (he is a nursing student, i am a working engineer)


On the third month, I ended it.


I was hurt but I never thought it was more painful to him. Young as he is, he had no idea on how to handle his very first "heartbreak". I can still remember the painful sobs and the countless tears the night I broke up with him. 


In the past, it is my unwritten rule NEVER to go back to any ex-girlfriend or ex-boyfriend for that matter. But now that he is in front of me, I just found myself saying these words...


"I miss you, and I hope we can give it another try"


But he just answered with a Smile.


From across the table, I can see that he is more mature than before. He is no longer the boy that used to cry for me.


I looked at the mirror beside us.


I saw a "boy" that is starting to cry because of him.