Movie of the Year.

If my life were to be a movie right now, I bet I would have this as my title:

"The Calling"

Dahil sa rasong simple lang...most of my friends are actually "callmates" lang. bwhaha. Ikaw ba naman bigyan ng kumpanya ng postpaid na Globe phone na may unlimited calls to Globe and TM, eh di kakaririn mo din and pagtawag. Gamitan lang yan! Wohooooo.

Sabi nga sa memo:

"We are pleased to give you your company phone which should only be used for official business only..."

Sagot ko naman "eh bakit, hindi ba bussiness rin naman ang "monkey business" ah? daaaah baaaaah? hahahaha, nababakla na yata ako ah!

Anyway, on with the show tayo. Now since I already have a title...it's now time to meet the casts...

Si Ahred - The First Love: 

Siya ung magiging leading man ko at first. He is the one that I am with at the start of the movie. Pagpasok pa lang dapat may love scenes agad para at least pa demure effect at wholesome ang movie.char! But eventually he would leave me...for personal reasons (kasi baka tuluyan daw syang mabakla.tang ina!). Near the end of the story, malalaman nalang natin na nasira na buhay niya....naging adik...basagulero...nagsisi at may planong magpakamatay (hindi ako bitter ha) kasi na realize nya na mahal nya pa rin ako pero di ko na tinanggap. (o wag ma imbyerna...this is my movie men!). May romantic scene na basang-basa sya sa ulan sa labas ng condo (este kubo pala. hahaha) at sabay sigaw sa akin:

"Sa-rang-He-Yeo" ay sorry korean version pala to...idub nalang nating sa tagalog . hahaha. (I love you daw ang sabi)

Na touch ako sa gesture at napasigaw din galing sa bintana....

"Pak yoh". Sabay tugtug ng "it must have been love but its over now"...Nyahahahaha

Si Drei-The Bestfriend:

When my world fell apart, I met this guy...ooopsss before thinking about kabaklaan love na yan...hindi...hindi siya love interest ko. He is one friend that I met during my days of beng lonely because Ahred left me for reasons unknown even to CSI:Las Vegas. He is the "sidekick" ika nga sa pinoy films. O! Drei wag kumunot noo mo at hindi ikaw bida...film ko to! Kung gusto mo maging bida dung ka sa blog mo mag inarte! Bwahahaha. Ganyan lang ang relationship namin...she's the sister..este...brother I never had! Wala kaming bed scenes dito kasi mag bestfriend nga...ewan ko lang sa kanya kung nag fafantasize sya sa akin. hahaha. peace bro! This is a typical scene from my movie. Magkikita kami sa isang lugar at dahil discreet ako...tatawagin ko siya:

"Hey dude. How are ya?"

At dahil super discreet din sya...sasagot yan:

"Shhuuuuukla...kalorkey galore ka teh" Nyeh! Tang ina. hahahah

Si Kenjo - The "Huli Ka" Guy:

Para may konting twist naman, dapat may conflict sa amin ni Ahred ng konti. Kumbaga may spice dapat ang relasyon namin...sabihin nalang natin na nahuli din ako minsan ni Ahred sa movie na may kalaplapan na iba. (O wag na kayong magtanong pa. Anong akala nyos sa akin Santa at di pwedeng magkasala? Mukha lang akong Santa pero di talaga. Naks). So Kenjo is the guy that I was with nung nahuli kami ni Ahred....syempre may bed scene na naman ito kasi for "arts sake" eh. Echos! At di lang basta bed scenes...rough sex pa dapat...Gago kasi tong si Kenjo eh..antsalap! Ang eksena...nahuli kami ni Ahred na nag sex nung lumingon ako nakita ko siya...tumakbo siya papalayo...si kenjo parang namutla at sinabing:

"Patay tayo...sundan mo"

At dahil mahal na mahal ko si Ahred, sumagot ako:

"Mamaya na...tapusin muna natin to" Bwahahaha. Landi ko!

Si Brentrich - The One Night Stand Guy:

Well as the name suggests, dapat talaga may.....bed scene....na naman! Syempre pangit naman pag nag one night stand kami na nagkwentuhan lang. Ang tawag siguro dun ay evangilization hindi one night stand! hahaha. Nung iniwan ako ni Ahred, pumasok ako sa CR....umiyak...sumandal sa pader....at dahan-dahang bumaba habang nakatalikod sa pader at may dialogue na...ang dumi dumi ko! Nung biglang may nag doorbell! Binuksan ko at nandun pala ang nag-dedeliver ng pizza si Brentrich. Lumabas ako habang basang basa pa at dahil broken hearted, demure at dalagang pilipina ako, wala akong ganang makipag-usap sa mga strangers...eto lang nasabi ko:

"Ano...tayo na?" Ang gwapo naman kasi eh. bwahaha

Ayun naka get-over na ako. (bwhahaha. ang tagal kong maka get-over ano?) Pero hindi naging kami kasi mali yung dineliver nyang pizza, sa kapitbahay ko pala dapat yun at ang ginagamit niyng pantawag sa akin ay Pizza Hut delivery Hotline! Wohoooooo! Natanggal tuloy ang loko.

Si Mac - The Promising Love:

This is the guy that you'll never know that you're gonna fall for him. Nasa background lang siya in the first few minutes of the film. Silent...reserved and fuckingly hot (hahaha biglang liko). Nung naka get-over na ako at nagpromise na hindi na muna magmamahal...ay siya namang pagdating ni Mac. Skeptical ako nung una pero nung may mga kindat...tapik at "I love you" messages na...natutunan ko na uling magmahal. Ang movie ay magtatapos sa isang napakakilig na eksena...hinatid ko siya kasi medyo nakainum (wala akong planung gawin kahayukan sa kanya kasi hindi naman ako manyak....malibog lang. hahaha). Nung inihatid ko na siya sa kwarto niya...bigla nya akong hinila sa kama at bago naglapat ang aming mga labi akoy nagtanong:

"Gaano mo ako ka mahal?"

Kinuha nya ang kamay ko at pinasok sa brief niya (tang ina ang tigas ng nakapa ko)...at this time close up ang camera sa "crotch" (parang porn to ah)

"Ikaw ang dahilan sa bawat pag TIGAS nito" 

Wowoweeeeeeee...Pilipinas Win na Win...ang shweeeeeeet naman! Tumambling kaya ako. That's the sweetest statement na narinig ko sa buong buhay ko. Hahahahahahaha

Then fade na ang screen....tapos labas ang credits! Kayo na ang bahala kung ano ang mangyayari sa ending basta nasa kami kaming dalawa at parehong tinitigasan...you do the math.

Those are the men in my Life right now...next stop...the women.....ewwwwwwweeeee

Hahaha. Kanya-kanyang trip lang to mga Adik! Washafuke!

Inosente de Ti.

Finding a hot straight guy in a chatroom full of gays, bisexual and trippers is like finding a needle in a haystack. That is why it was indeed very very lucky for me to have met...on cam... Kenjo_lee.

I know that he was not a regular on the chatroom that I often hang out with because of the fact that he used a temporary name and not a regular username. Usually, only 10% of the users in the chatroom have authentic pictures while the rest of the 95% are fake and posers. People do not take notice of you unless you have a pretty good looking pic...you are somebody who looks for and initiates  war and you are annoyingly ultra-friendly with other chatters.

Kenjo Lee was not any one of those. His temporary name was simply Kenjo and the font size and color he used was very small and plainly black....in short...he never gets noticed. He sent several invitations for anybody who wants to view him but nobody even took the bait. Now being somebody who often goes into the chatroom, I have known that most of the discreet people uses a temporary name or go anonymous because of the reason that they are basically...discreet.

"Ting". A bell of naughtiness crossed my mind.

I called his attention and the next thing I knew I was trading my YM account with him. We invited each other and made some introductions. He was straight forward in his questions...an attitude that strengthened my radar that this is a typically straight "teaser" guy. He invited me to his cam and in return I invited him to.mine. The moment I opened my cam this is what I saw...

Wow! That was what I told myself. Chinito eyes...cute lips and an innocently horny looking guy...what more can you ask for? He was shooooooomokinnnnn' HOT...HOT...HOT.

We started talking and his voice was very manly. He was such a good catch that I really cannot hide my fascination and admiration. I recalled fast my "Flirting 101" moves in the art of chatting. I really thought that this guy was very innocent because of the way he looks but he was as flirty as I am. Often I would throw jokes at him and he would just answer with a smile...laugh and then licking of his lips....a very inviting licking of his lips...and everytime he does that I would just feel my sexual urge shoot a hundred times.

After half an hour, I was already ready to end our chat because I was going somewhere. We exchanged thank you's because he definitely put on a great show for me...and on my part he said that I am a good and funny chatmate. I was about to say my last goodbye's when he stood up...and positioned himself in front of the camera.

What the Fuck!!!...He was only in his white brief...and then danced flauntingly for me. He sure was delicious if he was some kind of a meal. I nearly fainted! I felt that I skipped a heartbeat. I went back in front of my laptop...gave him a devilish smile...and my uninterrupted attention.

"Hmmmmm....so much for the innocence...here comes the real show"

Haha.Washafuke.