Asshole 101:An Idiot's Guide to a complete Asshole!

Okay, here's your guide to being a complete asshooooleeee. Not that I am one, I just know a lot of people who are naturally talented with it. I know one very very very well... (wink)

1. Look like one

 

- Okay in order to look like an A-hole, you must be tall...and ugly. You must walk awkwardly like Santa having swollen balls and of course you must have this special smile that when you do it, people around wanna prick your face with an ice pick or screw driver.

 

2. Think like one 

 

- Assholes have microscopic brains or it may have the right size but lacks the right minerals to actually function. Your brain should be more like a decoration and could actually be detached if needed. That is why you think like nuts, there is no symmetry in your thinking and you cannot even play connect the dots with it.

3. Act like one

 

- You shout! Bang things like helmets and notebooks! Get mad at an instant and before a baby can finish the word pooh-keh, you are already fine and laughing. It should be your day's biggest objective to berate somebody at the start of the day then if you are not contented  then you go find for things that can give you a right to berate another innocent soul then the list just goes on an on.  And then smile, get mad and smile and get mad and smile all at the same time.

 

4. Feel like one

 

- You should believe that you are a genius even though you look stupid. You should convince yourself that you are the only person who is all-righteous even though in every 10 decisions of yours, 11 are failures. You decide quickly without using that underdeveloped brain of yours and fight for it even if it means your shame, then if hell will break loose from your decision, you turn to deaf mode and feel like nothing happened. Kever!

 

5. Be like one

 

- The total package should be, harass people then smile... with fingers interlocked with one another, and then smirk! Then shout "who maade that stuuuuupid decision"!

 

There you go... you are all set to be a certified "ASSHOLE"

 

Funny... it reminds me of my BOSS! 

Washafuke!